Nobody. Nobody knew that my husband was an alcoholic. For years, I disliked how frequently he drank. For years he had control of it. For years after he lost control, he didn’t know/realize that he had lost control.
He was a high functioning alcoholic. He never had any performance issues at work, and was always well thought of in the work place.
We didn’t attend social functions frequently or go to events where he would have been seen in any type of drunken state.
When we did gather with friends and have some drinks, he was a mild mannered drinker. Never showing obnoxious behavior that looked “alcoholic.”
His parents knew that he drank regularly. They also knew I thought it was too much. His mom, who would buy him some unique beer each Christmas, stopped doing that out of respect for me. But they didn’t know the extent of it.
He was always an introverted person, so the increased desire to isolate was not the indicator that it could have been if we had been more active socially.
We honestly appeared to be a happy little family to those around us. We all had smiles in the family photos posted on social media. As is frequently said, “you never know what goes on behind closed doors.”